LoukeeyasBlog: london

Showing posts with label london. Show all posts

16 May 2011

windy in london..

its a nasty day, windy and cloudy but still no rain. my balcony needs rain coz am too lazy to water it lol

4 Oct 2010

i am still struggling to deal with events, am not coping well at all. my inner strength seems to have left me. life goes on, i know, and i have to try to find a job in the midst of this nightmare or risk loosing my state benefits. there is no compassion from the employment ppl, just pressure to find a job.
how can i look for a job or go for an interview when all i am doing is reliving my nightmare?
i am dreading the trial, and yet i know i have to do it-i have to try and find out WHY? why did he do this, why did he destroy me?
i am angry at myself for feeling like this, surely i should be strong and full of determination to fight back, i am not tho. i lay awake all night reliving that night, it just wont stop. a few minutes peace in the day then am back in that place again.
all these years i have longed for death so i can just have peace, i am too weak to kill myself, i dont even have the courage to do that.
all i can hope for is that it will finally give me closure.

15 Jun 2010

a serious issue

later today i am going to write about an experience in my life which not only was terrifying on a personal level but also had a huge impact on my life. it was a random event, i was in the wrong place at the wrong time and became caught up in something which devestated my life for over 12 years and resulted in my spiralling out of control.
looking back it still makes me panic especially knowing the person has never been caught. i have always been a strong person who can cope with whatever life throws at me, this was the one time when even my strength failed.
just be aware that i will be talking about an event that was terrifying and brutal and its consequences

12 Jun 2010

more random pics

me me me me me

just some random snaps of boring old me lol

17 May 2010

sorry

i have been so wrapped up in other things i didnt have time to do any posts.
well here in the uk we have a new form of government and i for one am pleased. i dont see why politics cant be more co-operative and work together more. yes i voted lib-dem but its ok they have teamed up with the tories. so things are looking up now

24 Mar 2010

spring is in the air...

well its coming tho it could do with warming up a bit - still, my window boxes are starting to sprout so soon they will be full of flowers

12 Mar 2010

weekend

well the weekend is almost upon us and i have had a busy week creating. i am slowly mastering adobe after effects and its amazing. will post some examples soon

1 Mar 2010

almost march

where has the time gone? its march already

22 Feb 2010

pretty

i am allergic to housework and other such dreary chores - still, i do manage to drag the hoover out once in a while lol
today am off on beryl the bike to visit my former workmates and say hello. i miss them all so much and i really miss my patients.

17 Feb 2010

life...

its quite a strange experience being un-employed - i am used to working hard on a busy hospital ward and now my days are dragging. well i suppose in a month or so i will be able to look for a new job which will keep me out of mischief lol

8 Feb 2010

monday

its monday already, have lots to do today none of which involves fun or excitement-just boring stuff. so am starting my day with a nice cuppa before i start making phone calls to government departments which always involves hanging on the phone listening to hideous lift-music.